QUESTION:
HOW OLD AM I?
See if you can come close to the correct age.
One evening a grandson was talking to his
grandfather about current
events.
He asked what he thought about the shootings at schools, the computer
age and just things in general.
The granddad replied, "Well, let me think a minute I was born before
television, penicillin, polio shots, frozen foods, Xerox, contact
lenses, Frisbees and the pill. There was no radar, credit cards, laser beams or
ball-point pens. Man had not invented pantyhose, air conditioners,
dishwashers or clothes dryers (clothes were hung out to dry in the fresh
air), and man hadn't yet walked on the moon.
Your grandmother and I got married first-and then lived together. Every
family had a father and a mother, and every boy over 14 had a rifle that
his dad taught him how to use and respect. And they went hunting and fishing
together.
Until I was 25, I called every man older than I, 'Sir'- and after I
turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, 'Sir.' We were
before gay-rights, computer-dating, dual careers, daycare centers, and
group therapy.
Our lives were ruled by good judgment, and common sense. We were taught
to know the difference between right and wrong and to stand up and take
responsibility for our actions. Serving your country was a privilege;
living here was a bigger privilege. We thought fast food was what people
ate
during Lent.
Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your cousins.
Draft dodgers were people who closed their front doors when the evening
breeze started.
Time-sharing meant time the family spent together in the evenings and
weekends - not purchasing condominiums. We never heard of FM radios,
tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters yogurt or guys wearing earrings.
We listened to the Big Bands, Jack Benny, the Lone Ranger and the
President's speeches on our radios. And I don't ever remember any kid
blowing his brains out listening to Tommy Dorsey. If you saw anything
with 'Made in Japan' on it, it was junk.
The term 'making out' referred how you did on your school exam.
Pizza
Hut, McDonald's, and instant coffee were unheard of. We had 5 & 10-cent
stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and 10 cents. Ice cream
cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar and a Pepsi were all a nickel.
And if
you didn't want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps
to mail 1 letter and 2 postcards.
You could buy a new Chevy Coupe for $600, but who could afford one? Too
bad, because gas was 11 cents a gallon. In my day, 'grass' was mowed,
coke' was a cold drink, 'pot' was something your mother cooked in, and 'rock
music' was your grandmother's lullaby. 'Aids' were helpers in the
Principal's office, 'chip' meant a piece of wood, 'hardware' was found
in a hardware store, and 'software' wasn't even a word.
And we were the last generation to actually believe that a woman needed
a husband to have a baby. No wonder people call us "old and
confused" and
say there is a generation gap. How old do you think I am - ????"
Guess and
then scroll down!!
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> > ANSWER -
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> > This man would be only 60 years old.
Richard D’Andrea Dover
In His
Steps Ministries
Previous
Jokes
To the world, you may
just be somebody...but to somebody, you may be the world.
Bill Wilson, Metro Ministries